Sunday, January 29, 2012

Packin' Up

Last weekend I did something that I’ve never, in my whole life, done before – I packed away my summer “wardrobe”. The first time this brilliant idea popped into my head it was an early workday morning; I was filing through the items in my closet trying to decide on an outfit for the day. My hand would land on a silky texture, or my eye would catch a certain pop of color – each hope of finally finding something new to wear was dashed by the realization that it was just too dang cold and gray to put on such a flimsy little garment.

Truth be told, I had quickly dismissed the idea of cleaning out my closet of anything that remotely resembled warm weather until this fateful Saturday morning in January. I had spent the week, like many other American women, feeling very unhappy about the few extra pounds I had put on during the holiday season. Unhappy – and fueling my unhappiness, not with more exercise, but with more Hershey’s Rolos and M&M’s. I realized that this pattern could not continue, so I sat down with a nice healthy little breakfast and my computer – and began searching for inspiration. After reading a variety of fitness and weight loss blogs, I pulled out my new pocket-sized notebook and busied myself with creating a list of long and short-term goals. I neatly penned the date at the top of my short-term plan and included seven bullets that explained the actions necessary to achieve my goal.  Once my list was complete, I padded down the hall to begin organizing my closet into seasons. One of the blogs weight loss suggestions was to clean up the clutter in your home, to allow space in your mind to focus on your goals. If my closet could help me lose weight, I was all for it!

I am a goal setter at heart. It brings me a great sense of satisfaction to envision future accomplishments, and then to set out plans for making it happen. January is always a month I use to rethink fitness & healthy living. I’m realistic – my goals usually have a life span of about four months. I don’t care that everyone else from New York to California are setting these same goals, or that my routines will not still be intact in December. However, setting fitness goals is only one part of my January routine. This time of year is so much more than, “How will I lose 10 pounds?” It’s a quiet time of year meant for dreaming about the future. What is going to fill my days this year? Where will we go this year? What will I discover about myself this year? Who might I be when the year comes to a close this year? It is a fresh time of year filled with endless possibilities.

Usually I’ve reflected, dreamed, and planned my upcoming year within a week of entering January. This year was different; I wasn’t quite ready to look forward, I needed a bit more time to say good-bye to 2011. Most years, as the clock nears midnight, I breathe a sigh of relief and say “good ridden”. I quickly scan the past year and see the glaring mistakes, heartbreaks, and wows that had filled my life. Not this year. I needed a few extra moments with my memories. It wasn’t that it was a marker year filled with births and weddings; it was a regular old year. And yet, 2011 was a year that taught me more about myself and my imperfectly miraculous story. It was a year filled with tragedy linked to joy. A year filled with uncovering my passions amidst the mundane. A year filled with stepping out and saying farewell. A year meant to be cherished and carried into my future days. I needed more than a glance and quick “adios” before I could move into 2012.

Towards the end of 2011 I read one woman’s view on the New Year, she did not spend January creating lists of accomplishments, but instead prayed and pondered her upcoming year. She listened and waited quietly for the word that would represent her year. This concept resonated within me, and as I have been thanking 2011 for its gifts, I have also been listening for the word that I might carry throughout 2012. A word that might bring focus and clarity to the tasks, events and moments of my year.

So, while I stood in my closet, taking short sleeve shirts off hangers, and plunking carefree dresses into my big blue tub I realized that it was serving me in two important ways. First, it became strikingly clear that I do not have enough summer clothes to call it a “wardrobe” or to ever pack them away again. However, the task of folding shorts and reorganized sweaters was just what I needed to bring closure to 2011. It also gave me the quiet space to listen and begin to tend to the vision of 2012.

I hope your year is all that you envision it to be – Happy Living!!